Tuesday, May 19, 2009

MISO PRETTY.....really?


On saturday, i went to fentons with a few friends. we checked out a store nearby and i found some really whack shit that they were selling. take a look at the picture above. MISO PRETTY? A western girl wearing a Chinese dress? im sooo effin offended by their use of "exotic" and they even translated it! wtf? im sorry but i don't think we ever use exotic on ourselves, muthafuggers.

im just so mad about this whole exotification and commodification shit. and the way they designed the bottle reminds me of this sense of "Asianness" that they're trying to force on the product. "MISO PRETTY"....doesn't it sound like a someone trying to say "me so pretty" with an accent?

hmmmm. this stuff is dumb and i wonder who would ever buy it.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

tulip in memory of last meeting


thanks jess, for the pretty tulip! <3

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Naïveté

I wrote this three years ago, and I want to share it.

The background story is I was dating this guy for a year, and in my naïveté, I thought he loved me, was good to me and all that... anyway, we went our separate ways eventually. Three years after we dated, he told me that while we were together, he cheated on me three times with two different girls. It's irrational, but all men were suddenly the bad guy in my eyes, even the guy I had then been dating for two years. This is what I wrote.

July 20, 2006
What is most uncomfortable is the giant wedge that was forced into place within my history's path. What never was now is, and I am forced to rearrange my future.

No, I did not kill him. He killed me. I felt his knife, now shy of three years, in my hastened "I love you" to my sweeterheart. I murmured these words in hopes that this past that never was that now is would turn into never again.

Three nights, two targets, one goal. His hand no longer touches me, but his blade extends in its reach; dost this black knight travel alone, or is it more likely that they are all the same?

I watch him gallop away into the night, lonely, but victorious. I am left bleeding, without anger, spite, or speech and left alone with shame.

This dreadful wedge, this stitch in time that pains my side, offers itself as a pitiful building block for my trust which has fallen and I am forced to make do as women do as I watch the coward that broke away break away and break away.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

high school immigrant youth

hey yall,
for the last 7 months, i volunteered at a non-profit in oakland that organized with Chinese immigrant youth, and i wrote this poem a few months ago because i was really inspired by the youth. i really learned a lot about their immigrant experiences and struggles. it was really cool working with the youth because they are hella smart and passionate about their community. so, here is a short poem to share.

[no title]

from east
to the west
for a better life and education
these words hang at the edge of our mouths
cross the common minds when we think of immigration
but how does it feel
to be in a country that's not of the native land
to walk and appear strange to the majority
to speak in a tongue that's unfamiliar?


it is like
trying to communicate the thoughts and ideas we have
but in the end
translates into something inaccurate
wrong
inferior
as if we lack the knowledge to see
the smirks on their faces
the degrading immitation of our voices
our voices
that connects the culture
history and identities that are deeply rooted in our homeland
from feeling embarassed to speak in public
to being silenced in the group
as if we are anti-social
as if we have our own cliques
when our cliques are the those who understand our experiences
our fear of discrimination
the hardships we swallow as strangers from a difference shore
yet, even if we lack the confidence
we fight for what our ancestors believed in
we defend our dreams
in what we envision as equality and justice
and try our best
not to navigate through system of oppressions
but to transform and redefine
by challenging the misconceptions
dominant worldviews
language oppression
and bring hope to the community
a community of diaspora and migration
that is the backbone
of the American
so-called dream

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Quotes for a Sunday Afternoon



"I came into this world, not chiefly to make this a good place to live in, but to live in it, be it good or bad." -Thoreau
What do you ladies think of this quote? This reminded me of you, VCoe, for your latest post. I'm sure that as feminists and activitists, we all get tired. We start questioning why we choose stress over sleep and protest over play. Right now, we're in our 20's. The prime of our life. Where will we be in 20 years? What will we be doing? Still working, still fighting? Where will the world be? Still fighting, still struggling?

Also, at church during the petitions this morning, one 70-something-year-old white man said in a slow but strong voice to the entire congregation:

"...this Mother's Day, let us pray for the women... for if women are strong enough to give care and even give birth to Jesus, then certainly they are able to be priests and bishops in the church -- for this, we pray to the Lord."
As a born-and-raised Catholic, that statement really means a lot to me. Feminists sure do come in many different forms. I wanted to throw up snaps in church, but I wasn't sure if that was appropriate.

Image Source: Spirit of Democracy

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Just a matter of fairness

I wrote this on 4/22, but this is something I'm passionate about and I wanted to share it with you ladies. I volunteer as an interpreter at clinics that provide free HepB screenings and in the labor and delivery room, and language access was my research topic in the decal I facilitate (AAPI Community Health Perspectives Decal).

Today, I got on a bus, and then there was a person in a wheelchair who also wanted to get on, but the bus driver said "the bus is full, unless you all wanna get off." However, people could have easily moved over to make space. It was definitely not "full." I assume the bus driver just didn't want to deal with it.

I'm a personal attendant for a disabled college student, and I've heard her tell me stories of people not picking up disabled passengers, but I had never seen it. I've only seen bus drivers be very helpful and respectful to disabled passengers, so I thought this was just F'd up. It was super HOT today, and I'm sure that man had been waiting for a while, and he just wanted to take the bus, but because he's in a wheelchair, he doesn't get to get on. He doesn't get the same treatment able-bodied people get.

This is similar to providers and limited English speaking patients. It's a huge hassle to find or pay for an interpreter or try to say what you need to say in way that the patient might understand. BUT, if providers don't provide them with intepreters, then they've denied them quality care of treatment that English speakers get. It's just a matter of fairness. Why doesn't that man get to go on the bus? Merely because it takes more time to lower a ramp and put on his seatbelt? Why doesn't a limited English patient get an interpreter just so that he/she can UNDERSTAND the MERE BASICS of what is going on. Patients' misunderstanding or misinterpreting of what a provider is saying can easily make the situation even worse.

Check out this article called "Growing immigrant population spurs demand for medical interpreters": http://www.kaiserhealthnews.org/stories/21apr09.cfm

Update: If you want to know how to access interpreter services, go here: http://calendow.org/Collection_Publications.aspx?coll_id=24&ItemID=314#

Male Patriarchy IS EVERYWHERE!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Okay, I am going to HURT someone....I am sooo angry....

So, a facebook friend's facebook status said "fuck you fuck you." Someone I am NOT friends with commented on his status "you're a bitch." This all came up on my news feed. I decided to say something about the word 'bitch.' And this is the debate that ensued.....


Jessy Lynn Sigler
"bitch is a negatively gendered bad word used to oppress womyn for centuries....hmmmmm"

Ilya Rakoshes"bitch is a negatively gendered bad word used to oppress womyn for centuries...

bitch is a unisex word used to express some form of negative sentiment towards all kinds ofl people in the modern day. stop living in the past, silly woMAN"

Jessy Lynn Sigler: "Wow Ilya. I don't know you but I am highly offended. Way to be an ally to womyn David....
Just thought I would let you know that your comment on David's status really offended me and it was highly inappropriate and degrading. You might want to think about what you say before you say it. And think about the historical connotations of your wording and the centuries of oppression placed upon womyn, with the use of that word. Additionally, I am personally very upset because I have serious issues with male patriarchy, which you so obviously exhibited. I have a long history of sexual assault and battery and I hope you know that you have just reinforced the oppression I have already felt as a womyn. I dont' know you, but I feel the need to tell you about your insensitivity and unfortunate actions.

Thank you for your time,

Jessica

I haven't assaulted you, and I sure as hell haven't even called you a bitch. Can you even name one thing I've done to oppress you besides emphasizing the proper spelling of the word woman? Feel free to read my response to David's status for the rest of what I think.

Woman.

Ilya Rakoshes
Why on earth are you even bringing David into this? Is he my handler all of a sudden?

Just like you militant feminists. The moment somebody disagrees with you, you try to make the entire male sex feel responsible for your "problems". Here's something to think about: Maybe if you want to be treated as an equal, you should work towards that instead of inventing stupid words like "womyn" in order to alienate half the population of the world.

It's people like you that create misogynists.


Today at 22:31
By using the term "bitch" you have reinforced centuries of oppression womyn have been facing. Similar to the "n" word. And I can spell womyn with a 'y' whenever I damn well please, it is a form of resistance, you should look it up. And of course you wouldn't think you have done anything to me, you have your fucking male privilege and you are content with that shit. By calling me a 'woman' again, after I have discussed this matter with you in a polite and respectful way, you have gone and disrespecting me AGAIN. Could you show some fucking respect and just back off? I get it, you think I'm a 'militant feminist." I'm sorry I have a voice and assert it when I feel MALE PATRIARCHY is being exerted on me by some fucking douche bag. Fuck you.

So when I call David - a male, let me remind you, though he may be effeminate at times - a bitch, I'm somehow reinforcing female oppression? Please. Get with the times: everybody and their grandmother is using bitch in a completely casual way. Did I even imply that I was calling David a bitch in anything but a playful way? Did I put my big patriarchal foot down on him and stamp out his rights? Not at all. You're welcome to continue getting worked up over nothing, but don't expect me to apologize for something I said to my best friend just because you didn't like how it sounded.



THAT'S THE END OF THAT.....DOUCHE BAG....

bridges

i wrote this during last night's bridges staff deliberations

This is my last bridges meeting. I’m struggling to find a point of departure. I keep asking myself the same question. How can I leave Berkeley feeling empowered by my experiences here? It is at these moments, in deliberations, when I see with complete 20/20 the ways in which I have failed the coalition. I didn’t invest enough of my time into developing other folks, though I tried in many different ways to do this. I guess, I just didn’t believe deeply enough that I had the capacity to do that work. I always talk about this quote about how it doesn’t matter if I die, that all that matters is that someone picks up the gun and continues shooting. I think a lot about that, how insignificant I am and how the importance of my work is just that it continues to live on in my absence.

For those folks who are stepping up as I step back and away from our bridges space, I feel empowered with their energy and spirit, yet saddened by the road ahead of them. The work will never be easy, but I don't want pieces of them to die for this work. I wish for them that they are able to embed their life stories into this work, to be able to present themselves completely and honestly to the coalition, and to organize in a way that is meaningful.

I know that not all my questions will ever be answered, but with time, I hope to resolve and reconcile some of the questions and struggles I have had over the last year.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Poem About My Rights by June Jordan

this touched me when salma posted it on facebook, and I wanted to share it on here too!!

Even tonight and I need to take a walk and clear
my head about this poem about why I can't
go out without changing my clothes my shoes
my body posture my gender identity my age
my status as a woman alone in the evening/
alone on the streets/alone not being the point/
the point being that I can't do what I want
to do with my own body because I am the wrong
sex the wrong age the wrong skin and
suppose it was not here in the city but down on the beach/
or far into the woods and I wanted to go
there by myself thinking about God/or thinking
about children or thinking about the world/all of it
disclosed by the stars and the silence:
I could not go and I could not think and I could not
stay there
alone
as I need to be
alone because I can't do what I want to do with my own
body and
who in the hell set things up
like this
and in France they say if the guy penetrates
but does not ejaculate then he did not rape me
and if after stabbing him after screams if
after begging the bastard and if even after smashing
a hammer to his head if even after that if he
and his buddies fuck me after that
then I consented and there was
no rape because finally you understand finally
they fucked me over because I was wrong I was
wrong again to be me being me where I was/wrong
to be who I am
which is exactly like South Africa
penetrating into Namibia penetrating into
Angola and does that mean I mean how do you know if
Pretoria ejaculates what will the evidence look like the
proof of the monster jackboot ejaculation on Blackland
and if
after Namibia and if after Angola and if after Zimbabwe
and if after all of my kinsmen and women resist even to
self-immolation of the villages and if after that
we lose nevertheless what will the big boys say will they
claim my consent:
Do You Follow Me: We are the wrong people of
the wrong skin on the wrong continent and what
in the hell is everybody being reasonable about
and according to the Times this week
back in 1966 the C.I.A. decided that they had this problem
and the problem was a man named Nkrumah so they
killed him and before that it was Patrice Lumumba
and before that it was my father on the campus
of my Ivy League school and my father afraid
to walk into the cafeteria because he said he
was wrong the wrong age the wrong skin the wrong
gender identity and he was paying my tuition and
before that
it was my father saying I was wrong saying that
I should have been a boy because he wanted one/a
boy and that I should have been lighter skinned and
that I should have had straighter hair and that
I should not be so boy crazy but instead I should
just be one/a boy and before that
it was my mother pleading plastic surgery for
my nose and braces for my teeth and telling me
to let the books loose to let them loose in other
words
I am very familiar with the problems of the C.I.A.
and the problems of South Africa and the problems
of Exxon Corporation and the problems of white
America in general and the problems of the teachers
and the preachers and the F.B.I. and the social
workers and my particular Mom and Dad/I am very
familiar with the problems because the problems
turn out to be
me
I am the history of rape
I am the history of the rejection of who I am
I am the history of the terrorized incarceration of
my self
I am the history of battery assault and limitless
armies against whatever I want to do with my mind
and my body and my soul and
whether it's about walking out at night
or whether it's about the love that I feel or
whether it's about the sanctity of my vagina or
the sanctity of my national boundaries
or the sanctity of my leaders or the sanctity
of each and every desire
that I know from my personal and idiosyncratic
and disputably single and singular heart
I have been raped
be-
cause I have been wrong the wrong sex the wrong age
the wrong skin the wrong nose the wrong hair the
wrong need the wrong dream the wrong geographic
the wrong sartorial I
I have been the meaning of rape
I have been the problem everyone seeks to
eliminate by forced
penetration with or without the evidence of slime and/
but let this be unmistakable this poem
is not consent I do not consent
to my mother to my father to the teachers to
the F.B.I. to South Africa to Bedford-Stuy
to Park Avenue to American Airlines to the hardon
idlers on the corners to the sneaky creeps in
cars
I am not wrong: Wrong is not my name
My name is my own my own my own
and I can't tell you who the hell set things up like this
but I can tell you that from now on my resistance
my simple and daily and nightly self-determination
may very well cost you your life

- june jordan
Heck yea! I've been thinking about this idea for a long time, but then someone also told me this could go really wrong. I'm glad you did it though, and I think it'll be tight.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

hey sisters!

critical resistance and consciousness could take different forms. it could be reflecting on an experience, something you heard in your class, something you saw on the streets, a picture, a painting, a poem, etc, etc. let's encourage everyone to have a voice and foster that consciousness in our every day lives. and let's have some community agreements, yeah? cause i don't wanna see this go crazy. <3 Please add more agreements if you want...

- be respectful and open-minded
- encourage others through affirmation
- dialogue through comments or follow-up posts
- be creative and have fun!


in terms of logistics like adding contributing writers vs. followers... someone should help out with that cause it's confusing to me. haha.

can't wait to see posts!

- jphung <3